And everything stops. Time it-self stands still. And the heart gets slowly pierced with a knife, but she doesn't notice the pain. Cause everything is still.
For just a second she wishes that she could cease to exist.
There is no need for her, so why should she live on? They wouldn't even miss her if she was gone. Would they? No... Of cause they wouldn't cause she meant nothing. Nothing at all. She was just a waste of space. A waste of air. They would all feel so much better with her gone. No wait.. that's a lie. They would feel nothing at all. Cause they wouldn't even notice. They didn't notice her now. And now was the last chance they would have of noticing her.
She left her laptop. Left the conversation, left the room. She went outside. Out into the fresh air. But she didn't feel it, didn't notice it. She walked as in a trance. She knew where she was going. Knew where her feet would take her. Knew it without thinking. Without hesitation. The stream. A clear blue stream of water to end her life. She saw her own body flowing down the stream, away into the woods, there to be eaten by foxes and wild hounds. Maybe even a coyote or two. Did they even live here? It didn't matter some were to find her. And hide what was left of her from this world. Let her soul get home to its maker. Let her find joy, love and
She took the last steps, down the small hill and down into the water. The water was not that high. So she lay down on her back, face pulled down under the water. And she gasped once or twice. She didn't even consider whether it was wrong. That thought never entered her mind. And then she coughed. Silently, not fighting at all no second thoughts not even now at the verge of dying. Not even now. She closed her eyes, as her mind said "God take me away." Her heart whispered "Love me yet?"